Jokes? Got any?

Much of our time is "go go go", so one of our favorite things to do is sypher through wholesome riddles and jokes and see if the kids know. It's really great when we're dining out or in the car or whatever. The kids love it, but I must admit, I think it's histerical! I have a few, does anyone have any more?


RIDDLES
1. What occurs once in a minute, twice in a moment, but never in an hour?

2. What can you catch but not throw?

3. What gets wetter the more it dries?

4. Forward I am heavy, backward I am not. What am I?

5. The man who bought it doesn’t need it. The man who needs it doesn’t know it. What is it?

6. What goes around the world but stays in the corner?

7. Light as a feather there is nothing in it. The strongest man can’t hold it much more than a minute. What is it?

8. What object has keys that open no locks, space but not room, and you can enter but not go in?

9. The more you take, the more you leave behind. What are they?

10. No sooner spoken than it’s broken. What is it?

11. There is a thing that nothing is, and yet it has a name. It’s sometimes tall and sometimes short. It joins our talks and joins our sports, and plays our every game. What is it?

12. Pronounced as one letter and written as three. Two letter there are and two only in me. I’m double, I’m single, I’m blue, green, and gray. I’m read from both ends and the same either way. What am I?

13. We are little creatures; all of us have different features. One of us is set in glass, one of us you’ll find in jet. Another you may see in tin, and the fourth boxed within. If the fifth you should pursue, it can never fly away from you. What are we?


Did you get any? Well, here are the answers:

1. The letter M
2. A cold
3. A towel
4. A ton
5. A coffin
6. A stamp
7. A breath
8. A keyboard
9. Footsteps
10. Silence
11. Shadows
12. Eye
13. The vowels A, E, I, O. and U"


Here's another one:
Q: If a plane crashed on the border of England and Scotland, where would they bury the survivors?
A: you don't bury survivors

Q: Twelve pears hanging high, twelve men passing by, each took a pear and left eleven hanging there. How can this be? How can eleven pears be left?
A: 'Each' is a mans name!

Q: If there's a frog, dead in the centre of a lilypad which is right in the middle of the pond, which side would it jump to?
A: neither, the frog is dead!

Q: You're a bus driver. At the first stop 4 people get on. At the second stop 8 people on, at the third stop 2 people get off and, at the forth stop everyone got off. The question is what color are the bus drivers eyes?
A: The same as yours, you're the bus driver.

Q: David's father has three sons : Snap, Crackle and _____ ?
A: David

Q: What has a mouth but doesn't eat, a bank with no money, a bed but doesn't sleep, and waves but has no hands?
A: a river.

Q: If the red house is on the right side and if the blue house is on the left side where's the white house?
A: Washington DC

Q: A cowboy rode to an inn on Friday. He stayed two nights and left on Friday. How could that be?
A: His horse was called Friday.