I'm reading this really informative book on "Life Skills". What attracted me to it was that I've always been flooding my mind with ideas of homeschooling my children... Right now my daughter is doing amazing in her school... I don't really care for my son's school so, I volunteer quite a bit and hope to get him into Ré's school next year. However, I'm always looking for ways to empower me as their first teacher and keep the door open for homeschooling if the circumstance arises.
So, I found this book. As I began reading it, I felt as though we already do most of the suggestions... Ya know, we pretty much have the children do everything we do, along side us... for the most part. My daughter is an amazing cook (scrambled eggs, fried eggs, omelets, pancakes, brownies... that kind of thing) and my son, who has no fear, insists on using the saw or axe to chop wood. They clean, sometimes better than others. But, there's still something I'm not doing quite right. Like, I'm very anal when it comes to my house being clean. I know, it's all me... It's kinda an OCD thing. So, if they fuss or are bored, I give 'em a broom or a rag. It's not always a great job, but it keeps 'em busy and I figure, with practice, one day they'll be great.
Now, I know that most people don't enjoy being "responsible" but I do want my kids to see the need in it (I don't want my kids to be able to read every book in the library, but lack the skills to dry dishes well) so, I was hoping that the book would give me some good ideas (I'm always game for a good idea). But, what I've found is that there were some things that I never thought of. For instance, about my own life.... I don't think my mother intended on this, but she didn't really "teach" me life skills. Now let me explain before everyone assumes I'm saying she was a terrible parent (we could go on for days). What I'm saying is that there weren't very many "skills" she literally taught me. Like, she cooked... and I'd watch. I don't recall much of her allowing me to do something entirely on my own with her over my shoulder giving me step-by-step instructions. But, I remember when I moved out having to call her for step-by-step instructions on things like how to make spaghetti or how to do my laundry. Now, as a kid I had chores and there were certain things that I'd figured out. But I learned to sew from a fashion design course I took in high school. My mother can sew beautifully, but, I didn't connect with her on it until after I had already learned from school. And I have family members that can make jewelry or quilt or paint a car or sew anything that you'd ever dream of or cook like they were born with garlic in one hand and perfect temperature in the other hand. Ohhhh, how I wish Aunt Elsie would have taught me to quilt or widdle wood (she's made so many amazing pieces of furniture, tables, chairs, etc.).
I didn't know how to fill out a time sheet for field service. Mom would dictate certain things and then leave it at that. Not that she didn't teach me things, I learned a lot. But, as far as "life skills" go... I really wish I would have learned much more. I did chores perfectly b/c my parents ran a tight shift with that. My dad is really OCD, he had somewhat of an unstable childhood and had to have something in control. Plus he was in the Navy and trained to keep everything spotless, ironed and organized. If I went to bed without doing dishes I was awakened (no matter what the hour) by pan lids being banged together or my mom would spray me with a water bottle to waken me... (needless to say, I hate dishes, ugh!) I was also taught to mow the lawn pretty well, ya know with a pattern and all.
I just think that we, as parents, feel we teach our kids a lot (which we do) but there's still holes in our parenting that we tend to overlook. Sometimes it's hard to stand back and let them do their own thing. Like, I want teenagers that actually clean their room and do dishes well....Which means I'm going to have to give step-by-step instructions several times and walk with them as they sweep the floor - otherwise, they just do one line down the middle of the room. I have to take time out and teach and be okay with the outcome. I have a huge problem with refolding the towels or socks that my kids have folded.:-/
My daughter loves to read (many times I've awoken in the middle of the night to use the restroom and found her with a book STILL AWAKE, reading...) but, I don't want her to not be able to change a tire or iron her shirts... My son is very hands on, I don't want him to fail at helping to keep a clean home and helping his wife and family to do things like cooking or braiding his daughter's hair.
In reading this book, I've found that there were a few things that made sense that my husband and I didn't come into our own marriage with. Truthfully, we lacked a lot. I could do most things, but when kids came, we assumed these steriotypical "roles" that we talked so much about never assuming. It was 50-50, yeah right! I would like my children to be responsible and then have responsible marriages and raise their own children to have these life skills. I think it will help to lead to their happiness later, do ya know what I mean? There have been many times where my hubby (whom I love dearly) could have just helped a little bit or cooked when I was pregnant... not that he can't cook, it just wasn't enforced and he had no desire, so we had a lot of take out... And don't let me get sick! The entire house seems to fall apart.
I hope I'm explaining this well... I'm not trying to come across as berating anyone, I'm simply saying there are some things that we tend to take for granted and forget about. I love being reminded of things that I never thought much about before. And I love my life. I love being domestic... most of the time.
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